Monday, October 17, 2016

My life Story of Porn Addiction and how It has Ruined my Life

      Back when I was in grade school and we started learning about sex, I specifically remember a teacher telling the class that masturbating was healthy. From then on I adopted this notion and decided that it was okay to masturbate whenever I pleased. fast forward 2 years later and I was in the 7th grade. I had just started masturbating and soon after that, I unfortunately discovered the addicting and traumatizing world of high-speed internet pornography.

      Being in the 7th grade I was shocked to soon learn that many other kids had discovered this 'internet porn thing' as well. I would occasionally talk with friends about cool porn sites I had found, and what they offered. I actually even remember telling a teacher that I watched porn online, and I remember him telling me "you shouldn't do that, you can get into trouble for that". I didn't quite understand what he meant by that, but I would later learn that in a way he was right.

      Fast forward another 6 years I was 19 years old and out of High School. I was still using porn quite frequently, and it had become a very normal part of my life. At this point, I had still not realized that it had become a problem(although it clearly had). Although I had been single for a long time, and had trouble talking with girls I found attractive, I had never made the connection to this with my porn addiction.

      Still being around 19 I had developed some erectile dysfunction, and I decided to stop masturbating to porn for a while out of suspicion. I quickly regained my sexual ability, and It wasn't long before I started developing more confidence in talking to women. Not only was I able to speak more confidently with women, but they seemed to like me back which was not normal for me. However, even after all these good things happening I still went back to porn due to boredom and loneliness.

      Here I find myself about 6 years later, and I'm still battling with this addiction to porn. After beating countless drug addictions, this addiction managed to somehow slip by, and it was the most deadly. I've decided that it's time to stop for good, so I'm quitting porn and taking control of my life again. I've come to realize that porn is just like any hard drug. It gives you that feeling of temporary relief, however, in the long term, it leaves you lonely and miserable.

      This journey will not be easy, but it's the only way out. I'm 100% sure that ridding myself of his addiction is the best step I can take in my life. If I went back in time and told my 7th grader self that porn would be so destructive, I probably would laugh at the notion. It's amazing how harsh the lessons of life can be. There are only 2 options though, learn them and improve your live, or continue to make the same mistakes and regret it on your death bed.